Ceramic is the new metal. \m/ \m/
I'm Jurggen Froos, the inventer of Speed Ceramic. It's a genre very much like metal, but without all the pretensions and theatrics. LIke, guys in clown white stalking the woods? Lame! That's got nothing to do with the spirit of the music itself. Which is why I went a new direction.
Don't get me wrong, when I'm howling out the arpeggios against a lightning-fast twin guitar solo, I'm no less tough and no less strong. But I'm not metal any more. I'm ceramic. Because today, metal is full of followers. And I'm a leader. A strong leader. A leader made entirely of ceramic.
That's right. My jacket has ceramic studs, and my rings are ceramic, and I got this cool tattoo in a gothic font that says CERAMIC 4 LIFE. And you'd better believe my guitar is ceramic. And my boots have ceramic toes. And my belt buckle and wallet chain? Ceramic. And so are my knives.
Because here in THE FUTURE where PEOPLE LIKE ME LIVE, we don't waste time on "metal" things. Metal is shiny. Metal is for children and cats. Ceramic is for conquerors and war hounds. Like my war hound, Sebastian VI. Who, by the way, also has a ceramic collar.
I rest my case.