Hey, we're the LAST company to make fun of someone's funny name.
We know, The Smushion. We know the cruel glares from strangers and the muffled giggles as you walk the halls. We know how it feels when your lead sales rep passes a card across a bar, only to hear "Oh, um... how exactly DO you pronounce this?" We know, The Smushion. We know it's been hard.
But hey! The Smushion! It's cool! You've done well for yourself! Maybe that's because you're so versatile, yeah? You can be a pillow, or a table, or a foot rest, or a cat bed, or... well, all the things we scrunch up normal pillows to do each and every day. It's just that you, The Smushion, are designed to do all those jobs right out of the box! No more squishin' and bendin' and manipulatin' and all that hard stuff. You, The Smushion, are a pillow designed to be more than just a cushion.
Aw, come on. You're not gonna make us explain it, are you? Okay, okay, fair enough, you're proud of your name. We appreciate that. Just for you, we'll go the whole nine yards. Ahem.
You, The Smushion, are a pillow designed to be more than just a cushion. You're designed to be... The Smushion.