What could possibly top a mattress better? How about... corn chips and chili!
That's right, we're turning your sleep experience into a sleep extravaganza! Introducing the new Woot.com Southwestern Italian Greek Russo-Icelandic Mattress Topper! So much better than a simple ordinary good night's sleep!
We're taking oven-roasted feta, smothering it with pico di gallo, frying that in a rolled up calzone that's roughly six foot two, nestling that on a bed of fresh cabbage rolls dipped in marinara sauce, then covered the whole thing with a five alarm chili-infused sourdough stuffed crust that comes with a collectable toy. Talk about a good night's sleep, right? The new Woot.com Southwestern Italian Greek Russo-Icelandic Mattress Topper is the ultimate fusion of taste and comfort! Order yours now and get a free Chocolate Chicken Noodle Brownie Tiramisu!
Or, you know, you could just buy a plain old 5 In 1 Mattress Topper and call it a day. But who's gonna do that?