“Living Boxes” they say? Where are we, a Jim Henson movie?

Yeah, hang on a second, the baby’s crying. I just gotta… wait, did something just move? Hello? Is there some magical creature in here trying to steal my baby brother again?

“Oho! Zounds, fair maiden! For I and my brothers are the Lock & Lock 3-Pack Storage Boxes, here to take your hand and sweep you away to a distant land! Gather thy hem about thy ankles, for we are to fly to the distant world of… hm. You don’t look very pleased to see us.”

No, no, it’s not that, really. I mean, you guys were so nice to me last time with that big maze and everything. And you “Living Boxes” are lovely, honest you are! You make everything so neat and clean and those see-through windows built into your front offer an easy way to find my clothes and linens and whatever-

“Mmm! Forsooth, we aim to please most ideally, yon maiden!”

And you do! Really! I couldn’t think of a better 3 piece set in all the world! It just takes about five seconds to set you up and when you’re not in use, you minimize down about, oh, seven times, would you say?

“A most auspicious and magical number! The very number first created when the Lady Angelica set her dainty foot upon the soil of The Lake Of Absolute Crystal and planted The Apple Tree Of Eternal Sweetness!”

Yeah, but, see, that’s the kind of thing that I’m not into any more, Lock & Lock 3-Pack Storage Boxes. You’re so nice and all, but… well, my tastes in art and music have kinda… changed.

“You… you aren’t so into pop songs now?”

I mean, I still remember them fondly! But… I’m more into other directions now. Stuff that’s not as… childish. You know, like Hunky Dory, with those ironic lyrics and pretty acoustic sound? And all that icy cold electronic music of the late Seventies, I’m really into that lately, too.

“Ah, yes! The sort of thing the Thin White Goblin plays in his Ice Duchy. I know it well indeed.”

WHAT? Lock & Lock 3-Pack Storage Boxes, are you telling me there are TWO rulers in that enchanted land of imagination?

“Two? Why, my dear! There’s at least a DOZEN! There’s a city kid who’s half alien in charge of the Land of Stadium, a crazy cat who lives above a bank in SoulTown, this strange puppet looking guy in charge of a pink beach, some astronaut that shows up every couple of decades… in fact, there’s even a hermit who lives at the other end of a hedge maze! I think you’d like to meet him, his name’s Scott Walker. Nobody talks about him these days but I swear, the Goblin King would be nothing without him.”

Oh, my! Lock & Lock 3-Pack Storage Boxes! Your enchanted maze isn’t just for little kids after all! There’s stuff for everyone!

“Of course, my dear! Take my hand and I’ll guide you back and show you all sorts of wonderment! Say, have you ever heard of a little fellow named Eno?”

I haven’t. Is he a troll?

“Sometimes, my dear, sometimes. Depends on who he’s working with.”

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