Pretty sure the Aztecs didn’t have serrated knives or easy-grip mashers. But that’s beside the point.

Lesley was slipping the announcement to her next party under Margaret’s door in 3A when Sylvia came around the corner. “Shoot!” she thought to herself. “Now I’m going to have to invite her like last time.” She wasn’t a big fan of Sylvia’s, but she didn’t want to cause any tension in the building.

“Hey, Sylvia. I was just inviting Margaret over to our place on Friday night. We’d love to have you there, you know, if you don’t already have other plans.”

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Sylvia was just turning the corner on her way to Pamela’s apartment when she saw Lesley. She tried to turn back before Lesley saw her, but it was too late. “$#!%!” she thought to herself. “Now I’m probably going to get roped into another one of her stupid parties.” She thought Lesley was a pretentious twit, but she did get a kick out of ruffling her uptight little feathers.

“Hey, Lesley. Oh, thanks, but I wouldn’t want to impose.”

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“Nonsense,” said Lesley. “I just bought a new Molcajete and Avocado Knife Set. We’ll make guacamole and quesadillas with queso Oaxaca. Mmm. Doesn’t that sound yummy?”

Ever since Lesley had started taking her Sino-Aztec pottery-throwing seminar, she was fascinated by the whole Mexican culture. So she was especially excited to use the granite tool to grind up the spices in the traditional way. Lesley didn’t think Sylvia was the type to be interested in anything cultural, so she was sure that she would make up an excuse not to come.

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One of Sylvia’s biggest pet peeves was when otherwise English-speaking Americans impose an exaggerated accent upon ethnic words because they think it makes them sound worldly. She cringed a little every time Lesley over-emphasized the words “MOLE-KAH-HEE-TAY” and “GUAH-CUH-MO-LAY.” But when she said “WAH-CAH-CAH” instead of “Wah-HAH-cah,” Sylvia knew she just had to be there to see the looks on the faces of the other guests every time Lesley mistakenly used the slang word for “poo.”

“Oh yes, that does sound delicious. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

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