Is a man not entitled to not get sweat all over his brow?

You work hard. You're a captain of industry. You deserve everything that's coming to you. Why should you give away your precious head sweat for free? Don't people pay rock stars serious money for vials of their sweat? How's are they so different from you?

So spend a few bucks and get a pillow that will balance your head ever so delicately on the Microhex filbers. Let the air flow freely and keep you a little more cool than if you were using pillows made by (sigh) the common people. Please note: you're a humanist. That sigh doesn't mean you think you're any better than they are. But you're certainly no worse either.

Through your hard work, you've reached a place that anyone could reach, if only they dared to join the struggle. Why use the same pillow as the weak and cowardly? Take your rightful place as society's Alpha and rest your head, weary from a true hard work, on a ribbed pillow that holds you up like Atlas held his globe.

And be the master of slumber you always knew you were.

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